A Sacrifice of Thanksgiving

It’s been a rough couple weeks.  There are lots of reasons for this, but I think the biggest one is spiritual attack.

I’ve been in a bit of a funk the last several days.  Desperate for a bit of relief, and answers, and yet none have been given.

Today could have been the lowest low yet.  After a desperate visit to the urgent care yesterday, I have the flu, a sinus infection and ear infection.  I had to take my kids to the doctor today, and watch one of them get a finger prick along with those terrible strep and flu tests…is there no better way?!  They both have the flu.  This is capping off what has literally been a month of sickness for all of us, with lots of little additional hard things at every turn.  We are worn out and discouraged.

This morning after an unexpected and unwanted early morning wake up call at 6:15am, courtesy of ear pain and a sneezing fit, I snuck downstairs and committed to coffee.  I cracked open the only place to find solace.  I was headed to Psalm 51, a favorite when I’m struggling, but stopped a bit early.  In Psalm 50, I paused and read:

“Our God comes; he does not keep silence; before him is a devouring fire, around him a mighty tempest.”

Psalm 50:3 ESV

To be honest, my immediate reaction to that scripture wasn’t very full of faith.  I chatted at God and reminded Him (hah!) that I’d been asking Him to come…that I was desperate for Him, His presence, His wisdom, and yet He hadn’t come.

I read on.  And conviction hit at verse 14:

“Offer to God a sacrifice of thanksgiving, and perform your vows to the Most High, and call upon me in the day of trouble; I will deliver you, and you shall glorify me.”

Psalm 50:14 ESV, emphasis mine

I usually love this time of year.  We usually have a grateful tree out by now to write down the things we are thankful for.  All the sickness and paperwork has not only had me missing most of my favorite season, but also a season of intentionality on thanksgiving.  As much as things seem to be hard right now, there is never not a reason to give thanks.  I have so much to be grateful for, and instead of focusing on all of that, I’m just focusing on the hard.

Our God comes…but I need to offer a sacrifice of Thanksgiving.  Which really…doesn’t seem like much of a sacrifice, when all things are considered.

I loved Ann Voskamp’s book One Thousand Gifts: A Dare to Live Fully Right Where You Are. It’s basically about thanksgiving.  It was a pretty revolutionary mindset for me when I read it several years ago, and one I’ve tried to put into practice since then.  I absolutely loved this passage from her book, and as I read Psalm 50, it had me flipping through her pages, longing to reread these words, a much needed reminder:

“Like the God-Man counting His too-few loaves and not enough fishes.  The one I remember from felt boards and figures pressed out smooth, where “Jesus then took the loaves, gave thanks, and distributed to those who were seated as much as they wanted” (John 6:11 NIV, emphasis added).

Gave thanks.  He’d done it there too?  Again?  I’d missed it and all of my life?

I’d never considered those two words, the bridge words there in the middle, the crossing over that took the not enough and made it enough.

Gave thanks.  

Euchariseto.  (side note-a Greek word which is earlier in the book described as grace, thanksgiving, joy)

Jesus embraces His not enough….He gives thanks…And there is more than enough…More than enough!

Eucharisteo always, always precedes the miracle.”

Ann Voskamp, one thousand gifts (p. 71-72, emphasis mine)

Thanksgiving precedes the miracle.

As I sat at my kitchen table sipping my now warm coffee, I embraced my not being enough, stopped and offered to God a sacrifice of Thanksgiving.

Thanks for western medicine, that despite my attempts to avoid it, were there when needed.

Thanks for coffee, and the opportunity to see the sun rise.

Thanks that having sick children is an abnormality and not a regularity.

Thanks for a husband that tirelessly served, cleaned and cared for us.

Thanks for the Word that brings life to my soul.

And you know what?  Thanksgiving preceded the miracle.

I was able to actually get up and move around today, and cuddle and snuggle my sick kiddos.  I had enough energy to get them into a doctor and was there to hold tight my son (who is looking more and more like a man) as he received his dreaded finger prick.  A sweet friend dropped by a gift basket for us full of the best sick day goodies.  Her efforts were an answer to prayer and brought joy to my heart.  And somehow, I’ve mustered the ability to get chicken noodle soup made for dinner.  Grace upon grace.

It’s November 10, and I’m busting out my thanksgiving tree.  It’s been rough month, and goodness knows we could use to move the focus to thanksgiving, to see the everyday blessing and graces.

I’m trusting that in our sacrifice of thanksgiving, our God comes, just as Psalm 50 whispered to me this morning.